If there’s one thing to say about my experience abroad, it’s that it was not what I’d expected. To make things clear, here’s what I did expect:
- to study abroad from January to May 2020.
- to see Harry Styles in concert (VI freaking P, may I add) on May 4th, 2020.
- to visit Rome, Edinburgh, London, Amsterdam, Helsinki, Barcelona, and Bergen during my time in Europe.
- to experience the change from winter to spring while in Copenhagen.
- to have five hand-in dates for my official DIS photos.
- to attend the CPH:DOX festival.
- to take my midterm and final exams in person.
- to use my Tivoli season pass more than once.
- to land at Newark airport on May 14th, 2020.
None of those expectations held through. I landed at Newark airport on March 13th, 2020, two months and one day earlier than scheduled. The moment I left Denmark, I realized there was so much I’d wanted to do – or thought I was going to do – that I hadn’t.
We make plans in life – some short-term, others long-term – and expect them to go accordingly. Often, despite our wishes, the best-laid plans can go awry, as Robert Burns so helpfully points out. We can plan for the future, but we cannot predict it with total accuracy and insight.
On December 31st, 2019, the first case of Coronavirus was confirmed. No one knew that on March 11th, 2020, it would be declared a pandemic. Earlier that day, my mom had asked me if I wanted to fly home early. I said no; I thought everything would be fine. Within a few hours, mine and so many other students’ realities were flipped upside down. Flights were booked with haste, bags were packed, and goodbyes were said with little to no processing time.
Was I sad to be leaving? Of course. But I forgot to mention one expectation I’d had: to have my study abroad experience be the best time of my life. Like all the others, that expectation was simply not met.
Sometimes, I get my hopes up (as in this case), and other times I set the bar quite low (like when I thought I would hate college). The thing is: an experience isn’t going to be incredible or equally as sucky unless you make it so. My time in Denmark wasn’t the absolute best for a number of reasons (I’m not saying it was bad, just that it wasn’t perfect), one of which being that most of my plans fell through. I was waiting around for the weather to get warmer, for the flights to get cheaper, for the time to be “right.” Instead of planning for the future, I probably should have just lived in the present. I’m sure many of us are still feeling that way right now, what with little opportunities we have currently and with no clear idea of how this pandemic will resolve.
There are times in life when it makes sense to plan far in advance. For many of us, having plans, goals, and objectives makes us feel at ease, less anxious. Then, there are times when the unexpected happens. There’s no way to see it coming, and there’s nothing we could have done. It’s silly to say “don’t make plans;” we need to be able to look ahead. What can be reasonably said, though, is “seize every opportunity” or “carpe diem.” Everyone knows that regretting what you didn’t do is far worse than regretting what you did.
The best-laid schemes of mice and men
Go often askew,
And leave us nothing but grief and pain,
For promised joy!
To a Mouse | Robert Burns (translated to English)
(Originally posted on March 30, 2020.)